Porn ‘destroyed my brain’, Says Billie Eilish the time for being coy has passed

 
Porn ‘destroyed my brain’, Says Billie Eilish the time for being coy has passed
In a recent interview with the Howard Stern Show, Billie Eilish explained that seeing pornography at the age of 11 gave her nightmares, "destroyed" her brain, and contributed to her sexual misconduct. Eilish shared: “The first few times when, you know, I had sex, I wouldn't say no to bad things. It was because I thought that was what I needed to be attracted to. ”

As a teacher working in Australia and abroad to address the impact of porn on young people, I often hear the same kinds of stories - especially for young women. Stories about their partners strangling, silencing, aggressive and aggressive, humiliating them to enjoy sex, and forcing them to do things they don’t enjoy - as a result of what they’ve seen in porn. Young women often talk about feeling difficult to say no, or that they need to comply with what they want because it seems "normal."

They also express concern that if they criticize pornography or do not agree with their partner's wishes, they will be perceived as "strong" or "cold." As 18-year-old Clara * puts it, “[There is] a little pressure on the girls to accept or to look the other way.”

Eilish now thinks that “pornography is a disgrace,” but she explained how, at a young age, pornography helped her to feel better and to become “one of the boys.”Her comments provide important insights into what we are facing - and why simply telling young people not to “look at pornography” or “just say 'no' to things they do not want to do is not enough.

Sixty per cent of young men and 41 per cent of young women report using pornography as a source of information about sex in the last 12 months.

What young people see in porn is far from immoral. The most popular sexually explicit material is often portrayed as violent and aggressive, often directed toward women, and often met with a neutral or positive response. The message sent by this is that violence against women is not only uncommon but also seductive.

As 20-year-old Sarah * puts it, “Every single person I've ever been in a relationship with is looking at pornography. From domination to the kind of pornography I have compared to gang rape. Young women often describe the difficulty in responding to pressure from partners.

Sometimes guys are really surprised that their partner doesn't want to do what they have tried to imitate in porn - because pornographic women seem to like it.

As one young woman put it, "It can be really tricky to find what you like ... especially if you have a partner who is just copying pornography and walking away, 'this is what I saw so' I will do this to you and connect you with your fingers as if. '

We all like to think that sex should only happen when, when and how it is wanted and enjoyed, but with the porn setting agenda, often, sex is unsafe, respectful, consistent or consistent.

The time for coy sex and porn is over.

Parents need to have discussions about porn with their children, and teachers and schools need to be equipped to deal with the impact of porn as part of relationships and sex education, with appropriate 21st Century curriculum, age-appropriate learning materials, and professional access. learning and support.

Because until young people are equipped with the skills to criticize pornography - and have public consent to do so - they will continue to pay a higher price.

Make no mistake, young people see porn. It affects young people of all genders, genders, skills and cultures. And if we do not support them to roam the influence of pornography in ways that make sense to them and to deal with their real-life experiences, then we are leaving them to have their own sexuality shaped by the sex industry.

It is good that Billie Eilish opened this conversation. How many other stories like her do we need to hear before we can grasp the magnitude and significance of this issue and find the courage to tackle it?